Would you make an appointment with a somewhat chubby girl
She just wants friendship Now you have to act quickly
Imagine yourself slowly waking up on a Sunday morning. Little by little the sun is pushing into your room. The beautiful woman in your bed presses her soft ass against your hips with a slight sigh. She wants to cuddle. But then she grabs the lust and you spend a wonderful morning in amorous love games.
But for you these are pure wishful thoughts. Because she just wants friendship. Instead of love, sex and ecstasy, she prefers to talk to you about her problems, her favorite series and (worse) about her man's stories. If you know this problem, read this article carefully. He gives you crystal clear instructions on how you will (almost) never end up in the friendship corner again and how you might still be able to conquer it.
Table of contents of the article
1. She only wants friendship because you made that mistake
"Let's stay friends." When you hear this phrase from a woman, you've made some mistakes. You either forgot to keep her safe or (and it is much more likely) you failed to build attraction. Let's take a closer look at both options:
Option A - You are a ruthless macho
In this case, you've started getting physical with the woman without first showing her that you are a trustworthy guy. You were to fast. You tried to kiss her too quickly and got too pushy. But don't worry. This case is easily resolved. All you need is an apology and less speed. Perhaps you came across a woman who needs more time.
If that's the case, give her more time, indirectly let her know that you like her, and show more of your human side. So don't tell her your last adventure stories, but show your vulnerable side. Admit mistakes and admit weaknesses. You can find more suggestions in the article: "Become macho and finally seduce a woman".
Option B - You show no sexual interest
That possibility is much more likely. Even the most uncouth macho finds a woman relatively quickly who confuses this macho behavior with true masculinity and gets involved with him. Most likely, you haven't shown your sexual interest.
If you want to seduce a woman, you have to make it clear almost from the first moment that you are sexually interested in her.
Martin lost a few interesting words about this:
Too often it happens that the man and the woman go on a date together and have a good time together. They enjoy sundaes of ice cream together, go to the cinema and have dinner with their favorite Italian. There is animated conversation about all kinds of things. At some point it will be time for bed and you will split up until the next time.
The next date is then similar. You go for a walk together or maybe even go ice-skating. During the entire date, the man has only one thing on his mind. He wants to kiss the woman. In fact, one or the other possibility arises on the second date, but it doesn't quite fit. They split up again and look forward to the third date.
Because on the third date it has to work out with the kiss. But it doesn't work here either. There never seems to be an opportunity to kiss. And after the fourth date at the latest, you end up in the friendship corner.
2. How a date should actually go
I'm nowhere near a great flirting expert who has understood how flirting, attraction, and the perfect date work for every man. There are too many ways of love for that in my opinion. But I understood what one of the most critical success factors of a date is.
For the success of the date, the place, the topic of conversation or your clothes are certainly important. But if you want to seduce a woman, you have to make one thing clear to her above all: that you are sexually interested in her!
You don't do that by telling her, "I have a sexual interest in you." Not even by discussing history or politics with her. And certainly not by being nice to her, bringing her flowers and paying all the bills.
You show a woman your sexual interest mainly through physical contact. In addition to this contact, sexual innuendos, body-related compliments, and clear looks are also good ways of showing your sexual interest.
But the clearest thing is still looking for physical closeness. If you casually touch a woman on the shoulder first, then give her a little neck massage, next lightly play her hair before you lean over to kiss her, you know what I mean.
3. Show sexual interest through physical contact
In the next few lines I will give you simple step-by-step instructions with which you can intensify physical contact with a woman over a date.
1) Hug her
You can establish your first intense physical contact with a woman when you are greeted. Don't reach out to her, but rather spread your arms and give her your warmest smile, so that you can hug her just as warmly afterwards.
If this is difficult for you, get into the habit of greeting every acquaintance and friend, man or woman, with a warm hug. If you're used to hugging people, it also feels authentic when you hug a woman warmly on a date. In southern countries it is normal to greet with 2-3 kisses on the cheek - try that too!
2) Small, fleeting touches
During the date, you can keep looking for ways to touch her. For example, when you show her something, you can point at the object to be shown with one hand while you lightly touch her shoulder with the other hand.
If you go out to dinner or go to a bar, be careful not to sit across from her. Stand next to her. So you don't have a table between you and you can very easily touch her shoulder or wrist while talking. Make sure to keep your touch brief at the beginning and intensify it over the period.
The woman has to get used to your physicality. As long as a woman does not reject you or turn away when you touch it, that means that your touches are wanted and that you can and should continue. Some feminists will hate me for this sentence, but it is my personal experience:
"As long as a woman doesn't say no, she means yes!"
Even if she says no, in most cases it means: "First of all, I want to see how serious you are about me." If a woman says no several times in a row and turns away from you to leave, it is neither a test nor a game. It's a resounding no!
But don't wait for permission to touch them. Touch them. Don't wait for permission to give her a little neck massage, just give her a little neck massage. Don't wait for permission to kiss. Kiss her!
3) Two steps forward, one step back
Just because you lightly touch a woman on the shoulder will rarely throw herself on your neck straight away. So you have to intensify your touch. The "two steps forward, one step back" method is very successful for this. At the beginning you touch her almost by chance, for example on the shoulder. But only briefly. You repeat that over and over again.
When she gets used to it, you can give her a small hand or neck massage. Again only briefly. To then touch her shoulder again. Except this time you can keep your hand on her shoulder. Two steps forward (shoulder then neck massage) and one step back (shoulder).
Once you've given her a little massage over and over, you can start playing with her hair easily. But only for a short time, only to return to the massage right away. Two steps forward (to play hair) and one step back (to massage). The point of this method is that the woman gradually gets used to your increasingly intense touch.
4) The kiss
If a woman just wants friendship, in most cases you haven't shown your sexual interest. This means that most likely you didn't try to kiss her.
When you've worked your way up bit by bit with the "two steps forward, one step back" method and are playing by the hair, she is usually ready to kiss you. That means that you have to trust yourself. Bend over and kiss her.
Two things can happen now.
Either she returns the kiss or she turns away. No matter what happens, you've clearly shown her your sexual interest and you've already won it. Because your offer has been made. Now it is up to her to accept this offer or not.
Maybe she's still unsure or she's moving too fast. From my personal experience that can happen. After all, I try to kiss the woman on the first date and then take her home with me.
Whether that works or not is of secondary importance. Even if she fended off my multiple attempts to kiss on the date and we said goodbye with a hug. If she wants to meet me a second time, she wants more. She knows that I wanted to kiss her and that I will try again. That's why a yes to the second date is almost a yes to the kiss and sex.
You shouldn't overestimate turning away when trying to kiss, either. I've had dates in which I tried to kiss the woman up to 10 times, but she kept turning away. At the same time she stayed with me, which is a clear sign that my attempts at kissing weren't uncomfortable for her. The 11th time she finally returned the kiss.
Incidentally, this technique is an excerpt from our free e-mail lessons ("Dating for Adults").
4. She only wants friendship - GREAT !!!
Hey man! If you've tried becoming sexual with a woman and she just wants friendship, this can be a test too. The woman may just want to find out how serious you are about her.
So if she says let's stay friends, I'd try two more times to get physical with her on a date, on principle. If she blocks that too, she just has no sexual interest in you. And that's perfectly okay!
You don't need to relate this friendship invitation to yourself either. You have done nothing wrong. Just as you tend to be more into tall or short women, the woman may also be more attracted to fat, skinny, or muscular men. And on the date she found out that you don't fall into her prey scheme.
There is nothing wrong with just being friends with her. In fact, it can be very helpful. Because good friends help each other to be happy. And your new best friend might have some very nice best friends.
In addition, it can be very good for you in the club if a good-looking woman supports you in flirting. So don't be offended if she only sees you as a friend, but use this friendship to get to know more women.
5. She just wants friendship - SHIT !!!
Or maybe it is the case that you fell madly in love with her and every moment in which you cannot touch her makes your heart burst. Let me be honest with you Once you land in the friendship corner, it's hard to get out of there. But it's not impossible.
I know a few methods you can use to conquer it:
- Meet her and look for cozy body contact. Invite them to watch a movie together and snuggle up together. Go out for two and stroll arm in arm through weekly markets or through the city's nightlife. Make sure that the physical contact is explicitly not sexual. Tease her. Pinch her little bacon deposit on her stomach and make fun of her. Friends tease each other. Again, you can use the "two steps forward, one step back" method. Except that this time you proceed very slowly and gradually intensify the body contact over several weeks.
- Meet other women. On the one hand, you may fall in love with a woman who will return your love as well. On the other hand, jealousy makes your loved one aware that she may have feelings for you after all.
- Work on becoming an attractive and manly man. This is arguably the most effective way to get your adored best friend's attention to you. Create a happy and fulfilling life for yourself. This shows you and her that you are an autonomous and strong man. Nothing makes you more attractive to women.
Remember: you cannot become such a man overnight. There is no switch that turns you into the perfect male conqueror overnight. This is a process that can also take its time. For this reason I wrote the seduction newsletter. In it I will show you many techniques that are even more intense than the "two steps forward, one step back" method.
My name is Sven and I am a male coach. When Martin & I founded Strengthening Masculinity in 2013, we had no idea what kind of revolution we would trigger in the German-speaking world of men.
Today millions of men visit this blog, watch our videos on Youtube or eagerly read our free e-mail training. Hundreds of these men set out every year to rekindle the power of their masculinity in our men’s workshop, Authentic Manhood.
I would be happy to meet you there in person soon.
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